Monday, 16 July 2012

IT’S NOT ME, IT’S EEW (EPISODE III)


This past weekend a group of friends and I decided we had to make a much deserved trip to the beach where we could relax, unwind and boost up energy and add a bit of oomph to our summer days.

As any trip to the beach, everything was quite idyllic except for the uncomfortable humidity, which could be fixed with a quick dip in the water. Pretty much the standard outing… except for the view.

We settled down right behind an older man who seemed to enjoy being splashed by the sea right on the shore. He was fleshy… very fleshy. Not at all appealing, but since we were in a public space there wasn’t much we could do about it except look the other way. Whatevs, right?

Later on, while soaking up the setting sun, we noticed a woman dragging her 9, maybe 10 year old son into the water right in front of us, and started, hmmm, how would you say? Splashing him and scrubbing him in his private area. Yep, right there, in public for everyone to witness. Apparently, the boy had something going on inside his shorts that made him itch. A lot. None of us could take our eyes off the scene we had front row seats to, and the mother didn't even flinch to the many pairs of eyes of those appalled of her inappropriate approach to an embarrassing problem her son was dealing with. And it didn’t end there. Whatever it was that had made the boy so uncomfortable in his nether regions, I don’t think that splashing salt water at it was doing the trick, and when it wasn’t working the mother proceeded to pull down the swimming short’s of the poor kid who was already mortified enough, and kept splashing more water at him. EVERYBODY was looking at them, and suddenly we saw the flashing of a camera going off right next to us. To make matters worse in the trauma this poor little fellow will have to endure, his own family took pictures of the whole incident with which I’m sure they will mock him for a very long time.

Oh, the old man and the boy? Probably related, since they were in the same group of tanned vacationers. 

Hopefully, the kid will brush it off and forget it ever happened, but if he doesn’t and ends up on a therapist’s couch wondering where it all went wrong, he could most likely pin- point it to the weekend he went to the beach with his family.

Thursday, 12 July 2012

THE AWKWARD INTERACTIONS OF THE SOCIALLY INEPT



As I’ve mentioned before I am a complete spaz when it comes to social interactions, especially when it comes to being around people I don’t really know. Uncomfortable silences are my presentation card since I use these to rack my brain coming up with topics to talk about. And usually the only topics I come up with are those which are inherently associated (at least where I’m from) with people with absolutely no social skills. No one wants to hang out with a person who develops rashes when social situations put her nervous and it painfully shows.

A one sided conversation I’ve probably held in the last year goes like this: “So… uhm… you like zombies? Well, of course you don’t! Who likes zombies, right? But, uh… what’s your stance on zombies? Will you be ready when the zombie apocalypse arrives? Do you think they ever starve? Oh, you have to go? OK… nice talking to… they already left… Kay…” Then I wonder off and remain silent in order to not creep others out with an awkward smile in an attempt to make it seem like I’m socializing. Then I creep them out with a smiling silence.

Sometimes I forget these new people don’t know me and don’t know I often refer to my dog as my kid or my baby, so I get two sets of weird looks when I say “Oh, my baby is so adorable! He usually likes to hold my jeans with his teeth at the same time I’m putting them on, but other than that he’s just swell! Uhm, I mean my dog... my baby is actually a dog. Yeah.” At which point at least one person present will recommend I watch the Cesar Millan show. Trying really hard not to eye roll, and just smile and nod. Creep everyone out when I smile showing all my teeth while my head bops up and down with unblinking eyes.

It is too difficult for me to meet new people. It is something I almost hate and at the same time desperately yearn for. But I don’t really know where to start.

Recently I google searched “how to meet new people” and the automatic search completed it with “…without being creepy”. Read an article with that in the title. Didn’t help, either. See, the thing is, what I find a little exhausting about meeting new people is meeting new people. Not exactly because I don’t want to get to know them (most of the time), but when asked about interests or stuff like that I have to try to seem normal, can’t be myself at first and that is just bumming in itself.

That’s what introverts are. Weird people with somewhat weird interests (many of them turn into obsessions, in which we see nothing wrong about), and skittish around people in general. We kind of feel like that cat on youtube that fights with its own reflection. “What is that? How can it be? I wanna get closer! DON’T TOUCH ME!!” We should form a club, but as introverts that just defeats the whole purpose, I guess. Although, somehow Comic- Con still happens. (Jeesh, I wanna go to Comic- Con 2013 so badly).

Well, as I was saying, it’s hard. Although, I do try to make an effort when I walk my baby dog in the park. I’ve talked with so many strangers oohing and aahing at his cuteness. I’ve met a few people who, when I run into them while my pooch is relieving himself in public, I will say hello to and ask how they are doing. But sometimes I get a better kick when I scare people off when they ask if he bites and I answer stuff like “Not anymore” (with a disappointed tone), “Not yet” (with an enthusiastic tone), “Sometimes”, and “I don’t know… pet him so we’ll see.”
Feature image VIA

Tuesday, 10 July 2012

PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE. I VIRTUALLY HAVE NONE


YAAAAAAY!!!

Finally! At last! It’s here! I have it and I couldn’t be happier! My all new bright and shiny kitchen!

The other day I posted about me finally acquiring my very own bright and shiny new kitchen, and how it had been a bumpy ride. I’d decided to be patient and calm throughout what remained of the whole process, until, well, that ride got bumpier. Like no- brakes- thrown- off- a- cliff- while- juggling- pigs- in- the- air bumpier.

First off, the guys who were supposed to install my kitchen neglected to tell me that I first needed to make an appointment in person at the Home Depot desk, so when the guy said “Yeah, I’ll come by tomorrow afternoon” he was basically lying. I couldn’t afford to delay the whole thing another week so I asked my brother- in law, Al, to help me install it, and thank heavens, he was eager to comply, since he likes building, installing, and what not.

So, I started unpacking everything and I found that some pieces were missing, which I assumed had been placed inside one of the packages, maybe by mistake, maybe to save on that wrapping plastic that can actually take over all of a living area space. I called my sister and notified her of this and Al said they’d pick me up so we could all go together to claim the missing parts.

We got there, we asked around and got referred to Client Services, where the person in charge realized two things: 1) the girl who made the sale sold me the kitchen separately, instead of as a package deal, which was obviously cheaper, and 2) she charged something in there wrong, and I ended up overpaying. Not good. Al told me I needed to chill, and if necessary not be around even, because that whole patience plan was totally crumbling down.

After much ado, it was settled that I’d have to return the kitchen, I’d get a refund and then I’d buy it back with a refund and the missing pieces. Al tried another approach which was to get the refund plus the missing parts without having to tote the kitchen back to the store. The clerk said nope, no can do, standard protocol. Not getting around that, we bit the bullet and took the kitchen back the very next day, through our own means (we weren’t going to wait around for the store truck to come by), and handed in the kitchen and got the refund back.

When we got to the Client Services desk, there was some other clerk at the desk (of course) and we explained the situation, since we needed them to clear the refund. Want to venture a guess at what he told us? He said “Why don’t I just give you the pieces you need? Less hassle.” That right there made Al lose his cool and now he was kind of like I am when I threaten these people I will punch them in the throat just for not paying attention and not even being on the same page when these kind of situation happens. Honestly, these guys can really put your patience to the test.

Anyway, after even more talking and paperwork we drove off (about 2 hours later) with my new kitchen which, by the way, was the very same one only wrapped in even more plastic.

Between Al, my pregnant sister and I, we managed to build the kitchen in a span of 3 days (we took Monday off) and by Tuesday, more like Wednesday at 1 am, my house was the proud holder of the kitchen that drove me nuts all the way to tears of frustration and then finally joy.

So here’s to you Al, because you managed to keep me from biting people’s heads off, put up the kitchen and remaining patient with me all the while keeping my sis from hurting herself. Although, to be fair, I think her ego got pretty bruised from when she put that cabinet door upside down.


Wednesday, 4 July 2012

POST ELECCIONES. POST ACCIONES


This post is in spanish due to the message I want to send out, and to whom.

Miércoles, tres días después de las elecciones, y como era de esperarse, millones no están de acuerdo con los resultados. Los fraudes electorales son el pan de cada sexenio y evidentemente este año no ha sido la excepción, pero con herramientas como Facebook cualquier inconforme puede hacer uso de su estado actual para hacerle saber a sus contactos acerca de sus puntos de vista y hasta denuncias con respecto a boletas falsificadas, robadas, duplicadas, etc., etc.

Soy de la opinión que en efecto el 1ro de julio hubo fraude electoral en gran parte de la república, pero no creo que estas manipulaciones de los resultados se limiten a artimañas de un solo partido. Estoy segura que incluso el partido por el que voté hiso de las suyas. Aclaro, el hecho de ser objetiva en cuanto a esta triste realidad no me convierte en una ciudadana conformista, ni mucho menos apática. Y a eso es a lo que voy, con lo siguiente.

Resulta que, Facebook no solo brinda la oportunidad de difundir información que si bien, como mexicanos nos interesa o nos debiera interesar acerca del proceso electoral y las diversas actividades ilícitas que el PRI cometió, no solo el domingo de elecciones, sino a lo largo de toda su campaña electoral. Bien, estoy de acuerdo con ello. Con lo que no estoy de acuerdo es que la gente que decide hacer este tipo de ciber- manifestación al parecer cree que los que no lo hacemos es porque somos apáticos, que no nos importa lo que suceda con nuestro país o que estamos de acuerdo con el resultado. Yo estoy de acuerdo con que se haga un conteo limpio y transparente y que quede el presidente que la mayoría relativa escogió. Pero no a costa de agresiones pasivas- agresivas.

Uno de mis contactos en Facebook puso esta imagen con este mensaje:


Estoy de acuerdo, la historia no se escribió en un día y se requiere de mucha gente para realizar un verdadero cambio, pero ese el detalle, ¿cuántos realmente están dispuestos a hacer un cambio?
Lo que es peor, muchos de estos inconformes no sintieron este despertar social, ni su conciencia como mexicano les hablaba hasta hace poco, es casi como si fuera una moda. Por eso, muchos de los que aguardaban con ansias el 1ro de julio con la esperanza de que las aguas políticas se apacigüen y el ambiente hostil intolerante fuera terminado, llegaron a poner estados con mensajes como los que se quejan en dicha imagen.

Una de esas frases, si bien no lo puse textualmente en mi estado de FB, sí compartí un par de imágenes con mensajes acerca de que el cambio está en uno, si tú como individuo no te esfuerzas en hacer un cambio como ciudadano para con tus demás compatriotas, no esperes que los políticos de alto rango lo hagan también.

No puedes exigir algo que tú tampoco cumples. Ejemplo 1 (y no me canso, ni me cansaré de decir lo siguiente): ¿Haces caso de los señalamientos de tránsito como debe de ser? DIARIO me toca enfrentar conductores que no saben siquiera lo que quiere decir “CEDA EL PASO” si estás leyendo esto y no sabes a que me refiero, es este señalamiento:


Y quiere decir que si está de tu lado, significa que TÚ debes frenar y darle el paso a los automóviles que vengan y converjan con tu carril (porque ese es el caso en los que se usa esa señal).

Hay quienes ni siquiera hacen caso de los semáforos. ¡Más claros no pueden ser! Pero hay gente que se cree superior porque al parecer tienen mucha más prisa y cosas mucho más importantes que hacer que un insignificante semáforo no los puede detener.

Esos señalamientos, para que me entiendas, son como "pequeñas leyes" que debemos obedecer. Digo pequeñas, pero no por ello insignificantes, pues si las sigues puedes incluso salvar vidas al evitar ponerlas en peligro, no solo por si chocas con alguien más, sino porque es posible que lleves a alguien más en tu carro. Esa es una vida que está en tus manos cuando manejas. Estas “pequeñas” leyes son fáciles de seguir, ni pierdes nada acatándolas, ni ganas nada si no lo haces. Ahora, si eres de los que no te gusta frenar ante un alto en una intersección, yo te hago la siguiente pregunta: ¿Si tú no puedes respetar esta ley de tránsito, en la que no ganas dinero, cómo esperas que un político obedezca una ley en la que de lo contrario, se embolsaría miles de pesos?

NO EXIJAS ALGO QUE TÚ NO PUEDES CUMPLIR

Ejemplo 2: ¿Tiras basura en la calle? ¿Eres de las personas que se pasean en la plaza de la catedral, compras tus tostitos con queso o con lo que sea, vas y te sientas a una de las bancas y cuando terminas ni siquiera eres capaz de tirar la bolsa a la basura, que por cierto está a unos escasos tres metros de donde estás sentado? Yo no entiendo las personas que dicen que nuestro país es muy feo por sus políticas y corrupciones, pero ni siquiera se les puede molestar con que tiren los envoltorios en la basura, o si están en la calle, y como suele suceder, no hay botes de basura cerca, pues mínimo guardarlo en una bolsa o algo hasta encontrar propiamente donde depositarla.

Si tú no quieres cambiar tus hábitos de tirar la basura donde se debe, entonces no te quejes de la basura que hacen nuestros representantes políticos.

NO EXIJAS ALGO QUE TÚ NO PUEDES CUMPLIR

Hay muchos más ejemplos que puedo poner, pero por ahora la dejaré ahí, porque, en cuanto a esos dos ejemplos, todavía no termino. Tenemos el país que nos merecemos, punto. ¿Qué si cómo lo sé? Fácil te la pongo. Las veces que he ido a Estados Unidos me fijo en como los mexicanos que también van a hacer sus compras allá, sí respetan las leyes de tránsito, ceden el paso cuando corresponde, hacen señalamiento que van a dar vuelta, no tiran basura a la calle. ¿Y por qué lo hacen? Porque allá sí tienen miedo de que se les imponga una multa si cometen alguna infracción. Allá hay que comportarse cómo gente civilizada y de primer mundo porque allá las leyes no son un chiste como los aquí. (Aclaración, no digo que Estados Unidos sea perfecto, pero al menos podemos estar de acuerdo en que están mejor en muchos aspectos que en México.)

No se me olvida una ocasión en la que regresábamos de Douglas, AZ, y una Cherokee blanca con placas de Sonora que venía delante de nosotros, al introducirse a Agua Prieta aventó desde su carro una bolsa de plástico con basura a la calle, así sin más. Que poco le importa a esa persona su país.  Y así hay muchos que de esa forma no les importa México pero están dispuestos a manifestarse porque el resultado no “favorece al país”. Esos ciudadanos son los que no favorecen nuestro crecimiento como nación.

Dirán que porque no me levanto a manifestarme en público soy apática, y que no defiendo mi nación. Con el corazón en la mano le digo a esa gente, denme un país que se merezca esa lucha. No pretendo olvidar que sí hay gente buena en México que sí lucha y trabaja, pero para sacar adelante a su familia, y por ellos vale la pena esforzarse también para salir adelante, todos unidos como pueblo. Pero hasta que no haya un cambio en nosotros como ciudadanos en el que haya respeto mutuo y respeto por el suelo que llamamos patria, no creo que un presidente, de cualquier partido que sea, logre el cambio que todos aspiran.

Saturday, 30 June 2012

MY WAY OR... THE HIGHWAY?


Not actually my new kitchen, but close enough

These last few weeks I’ve been dealing with renovations to my house, mainly in the kitchen area, thanks to that little fellow who decided to visit for a while, until it met its destiny. I decided it was kind of like a break up, in which anything it touched is thrown away. I don’t wanna see, it I don’t wanna touch it, I just want it out and done with. Or maybe I just used it as an excuse to finally do what I had been postponing for no good reason at all.

First, I got rid of the sink and a really old oven range in which I couldn’t really bake anything because I was sure I’d fly across the house in a gas leakage related explosion. Because of that I’ve been without the privileges of a kitchen for a whole week, and managing with an electric pan and a microwave oven. I guess I didn’t think that through.

During the week I bought a new kitchen counter, sink, oven and I’m finally having kitchen cabinets. This to me is quite a big deal, which makes me feel more like an adult living in an adult house, with adult things, while watching Downton Abbey like an adult. But none of that will be installed until maybe today.

Home upgrades aside, what I’m learning a lot about here is patience, or the lack of it in me. Not everything has turned out the way I’ve wanted or planned. And it really gets to me. I get really annoyed when a minor setback ensues, I get mad at the wrong people and I end up regretting doing what I started.

If anything I should take this as a valuable life lesson, and accept that not everything will be what I expect it to be. Surprises will be thrown here and there, and what matters is how you deal with it. Nothing good comes out of making a tantrum, or crying, or worse, giving up on what you are working for, just because someone else tells you it can’t be done the way you had planned. It’s not really the end of the world, and it’s not that it’s impossible to achieve it your way, you’re just taking another road which eventually will take you to where you want to go, so to speak.

I’m nearly at the end of my kitchen project, and some curve balls could be thrown my way, but I will try and remember there is no way that is going to stop me. If you’re a little bit like me and delays in your plans irritate you, don’t let it take over you. You’ll feel sorry afterwards. I learned it not the hard way, more like the embarrassing way. Take my word for it, you don’t want to be like me and cry in front of the two guys who tell you they can’t install your kitchen sink because the current placement of your plumbing is actually getting in the way. These guys are not sensitive and pretty much don’t care what you’ve already been through. So suck it up and ask what the next step is and move on. And pray that all is done by the time the third season of Downton Abbey gets here, because that’s the only kind of drama worth crying for anyway.

Feature image taken by me.

Tuesday, 26 June 2012

R.I.P. NORA EPHRON



Today I was going to write a whole other post, but upon reading recent news of Nora Ephron’s demise, I’d like to dedicate this piece to her.

Nora Ephron was a writer and director that made millions of other women around the world laugh, cry, fall in love with Meg Ryan and made us dare to dream of the idea of living in New York. Nobody portrays New York like she did. Nobody else will.

The stories she told were filled with quirky characters, compelling love stories, inspiring friendships and above all the extraordinary presence of hope.

What I love most about her movies is the fact that even if they are fictional, with the exception of Heartburn and Julie & Julia, she handled them in a way that they seem so real, like you actually know a couple like Harry Burns and Sally Albright, who bicker in the most adorable way, and while she might be high maintenance he doesn’t care and he loves her because of that. Or maybe you and your best friend are like Annie Reed and Becky in Sleepless in Seattle and together you read into every single sign or obsess over An Affair to Remember together. Or maybe you feel comfortable talking to a stranger you’ve never met and tell him anything and everything that’s on your mind making a connection like you’ve never felt with anyone else you’ve met in person.

See, that’s the secret to Nora Ephron’s movies, she held ordinary situations in her hands and turned them into extraordinary stories that transcend time, making every bit of her work into a masterpiece. I believe her passing away is a big loss for the film industry, and the fact that we shall never see something new from her, is reason enough to mourn.

She was sensitive and had a tender way to narrate, but at the same time she was a strong woman who lived an amazing life.  A great example of feminine power she lead the way for many other directing and writing women in an industry that was largely male in her time.

To me, her movies mean so much to me, and maybe she might have thought it was nothing, but if I would’ve had the opportunity to say it to her, I would say that all this nothing has meant more to me than so many somethings. And also, maybe ask her what sort of hat a butterfly would buy, even if it turned out o be a mistake, like most hats are.

Feature image via

Thursday, 21 June 2012

RESOLUTION: RESPECT


I guess it’s kinda weird to talk about New Year resolutions when we are half way through the year, but hear me out for a bit. Do you make resolutions at all? Have you kept any? Are they the same every year or do you make new ones?

I for one have never done a resolution to make New Year resolutions in my entire life. That is until this year started. You see, as I was leaving town to visit my parents for the holidays, and as i waited for my plane to arrive, browsing for light, humoristic reading material in an airport book store, I found shoved under paperbacks in a corner a book by Gretchen Rubin titled The Happiness Project. The author narrates how in a span of a year she made it her mission to achieve happiness, even though it is a highly subjective matter, through resolutions she assigned herself for every month of that year in order to fix or improve different aspects of her life, such as her relationships with her husband, her daughters, household, friends, work and even to start a blog. Of course, her project was specific to her own needs, but it is adaptable for anyone else if desired to follow something like that.

It appealed to me at first, being that I wanted a fresh start in a lot of things going on for me at that moment. Since I was also going through some setbacks in certain relationships, I decided to give it a go, and step by step fix or improve and see what would happen. Things could only be for the better.

January and February resolutions were started but not quite kept, so maybe I’ll start over on them, which were to keep a tidier house and to eat healthier.

On March I followed into Mrs. Rubin footsteps and began a blog. That resolution I kept, but I guess I should pick up the pace.

After that I sort of stopped setting resolutions for myself and let 2012 go on by as any other year.  Except for one little detail. Since the beginning of the year I meant to make this my year. Not in a “I’m getting married this year” like Charlotte kind of way, but in the sense that I will do what I want when I want to do it, just as long as I don’t step on people’s feelings.

I usually felt like I had to do things that would please others and masquerade that as something I wanted to do. Sometimes it was in order for them to feel better about themselves, even when it was clear I wasn’t up for it, for the sake of not having a major drama spill. Kind of like trying to contain acid in a Styrofoam cup all the while smiling and telling people I don’t mind getting my hands burned.

Really, it’s not that big a deal the shift I made. I just say yes when I want to say yes and no if I want to say no, of course, always minding others feelings. See, it might be a bit selfish on my part but there is no reason to be rude. I’m already rude in other ways so no need to add more to it. Just kidding. Sort of. I mean, if I don’t feel like going out one weekend, I don’t see the big deal in saying I’ll just stay in. Unless of course I’m nagging to go out and then don’t show up, well that’s just rude. Anyway, what I mean is that I won’t care if people think I don’t want to socialize with them, because probably they don’t even think that and it’s me who’s extra worrying over what others think of me.

Actually, that means that the shift I made isn’t really about what others think but what I think they are thinking, which, let’s face it, is boring even to type. Really! Why would I set myself up for that before? It was clearly nobody’s problem but my own, except now I know and I can do something about it. The thing is, I have always had this “whatever” attitude and had pretty much no regard what anybody else thinks, (or so it seems) and I just decided to put a label on it so I could justify it. But then I hadn’t realized I didn’t need to justify it to anyone.

So, without knowing, I basically made a resolution to respect myself, which in the end (or actually, the beginning) was all I wanted to achieve. I felt I wasn’t respected by some people and until I decided to do something about it did I truly feel that respect. Maybe, not directly from them but, at least I respected my decisions and stopped hating myself at the end of the day. I had to make drastic changes and hard decisions in order to get where I am in that matter, but I feel more like myself and lighter even.

Any change to make yourself feel better could only be for the best, so if you feel like throwing caution to the wind and do what your heart desires go for it, you will not regret it. Maybe it could be taking a trip alone, or quitting your job to start a business on your own, it could be anything really, but if you want to do it, who’s to say you can’t? Maybe someday I’ll do any of those things, too, when the time is right, but for now I will do my own version of making everyone gasp in horror when I go to the theaters to watch Breaking Dawn Part 2 premiere this fall. You can all suck it. Get it? Suck it? Haha.